...I AM MORE STUBBORN THAN MY BABY!!!
So Jack had his 6 MONTH wellness check this week... I know, holy cow right!! It's so hard to believe that he is half a year old!
Anyway, I'll give you the stats in a min, but first I must tell you the true reason for my need to write this blog. We have been struggling with nights and Jack ever since his surgery. Before he had his little noggin' cut open my sweet baby was sleeping from about 8:00 pm to 4:00 am... I was proud. That was easy! I was relieved that we didn't have to do any real sleep training...
Fast forward to 2 months post op! AAAAHHHHHHH!!! I'm more tired now that when he was an infant. Not only is he waking up every 30 min to 2 hours, but he moves ALL day! (crawling is just around the corner too -- oh boy!) Last month our pediatrician told me to start getting him to sleep more by "crying it out." We discovered quickly that we are not fans of this method!! After two nights of screaming for 2 hours without a break and then staying up pretty much the rest of the night I gave up!
I was advised by some really great moms to try to "dream feed." Aaron calls this the "phantom feed" because he can just hear what Jack would tell us in the morning if he could talk, of his odd dream about being mysteriously lifted from his crib in his sleep and returning somehow full and content (kinda like an alien abduction or something) This worked for about two nights until Jack started waking up on his own to eat at about 10:30 or 11:00 before I even had the chance to get in there and feed him in his sleep!
We tried a few other tactics without luck...
This is when the nights got rougher... I think we confused the heck out of the poor little guy! He was waking up every hour or so wanting to at least be held and I became a softy and gave him what he wanted!
We finally got him back to the "up about 3 times before morning" routine before this last doctor's visit. I kind of relayed this to our pediatrician (without making me look too moronic). He said to me, I have to do it... crying out will work, just do it!
I shrugged him off in my mind - no way will I let my baby scream for that long... it can't work for everyone!
THEN!!! I asked him how long do I let him cry for.
"Until he stops," he said. "He will go to sleep eventually"
I said, "He cried with no consoling him for 2 hours straight!"
"Let him go longer," he says. "He is a stubborn one, isn't he?"
This is when Jack looked at him and laughed! Literally, right when he said it Jack turned his head away from his toy looked at the doctor and laughed!
This is when I decided I can let Jack out stubborn me! If I let him beat me now I can't imagine him as a toddler and adolescent!
Now, those of you that know us well know that if Jack got his stubbornness from anyone, it wasn't his father... I can pout, and dig my claws in, and outright compete with the best of them! Just ask my parents about Kerre as a child if you don't believe me!
So my stubbornness kicked in and I am now stubborning to stubborn to be more stubborn than my baby! I WILL WIN!!!
So here's how we're doing... Yesterday we started with naps... My modified crying it out method was to put him down sleepy but still awake. Leave for 5 min, come back for 5 min, leave for 5 min and so on... The first nap took 30 min for him to go to sleep! I was amazed... by bed time he was out in 10 min!!!!! - this is just after one day and three naps!! (today is 4 min in, 6 min out... tomorrow 3,7...)
Now the waking up at night will still be a struggle, but we are going to conquer the naps first then get more determined with night time wakes!
For those of you that made it to the end of this -- Jack is now the size of an average 10 month old!! (18 lbs and 28 1/4 in long) Whod-a-thunk that Aaron and I would make a big baby? He's pretty much all muscle.
He is sitting up very well - has been for three weeks (we surprised the pediatrician with that one) -- the helmet has made is neck super strong!
He had 5 shots at his appointment and did very well with them! (he wore his Mr Happy shirt in optimism that he wouldn't be too mad at me)
He is now eating solids three times a day and gets to start meats.(oh yum!)
He also has just about mastered the army crawl. Here's a video, but mind you this was 3 days ago and he's improved A LOT since then! He can go much further and turn as necessary to get a toy... he amazes me daily!
I love being a Mommy!
OK, I am giggling over a conversation we had at cell group with Jenny and Matt over this same issue and you said, "Jenny, just let him cry it out...he will learn to sleep." It is SOOO MUCH harder than people realize, but so worth it in the end. IT usually takes about 2-5 days and then you are able to sleep a whole night and say "What the heck was I thinking not to do that sooner!!" For Izzie, which I had a harder time with because I waited longer...the older the longer they take...it took amazing self-control because I so wanted to give in. I ended up putting a LOUD fan in my room and we couldn't hear her and the next morning we were both happy..VERY!!
ReplyDeleteHang in there!!
OH MY GOSH! My grandson is the smartest thing in the world with that little army crawl. I always knew that he was a genious. About the crying thing. Yeah, it works. It is the hardest thing to do if my memory serves me correctly. Hopefully everyone will be sleeping a lot more soon. If not, just call Nana and I will be there so you can get R & R. We love you guys and think you are the best parents ever. Jack is a very lucky kid.
ReplyDeleteKerri the crying thing does work! I am (but not when its necessary) the tender hearted one in our relationship when it came to things like that. I realized when he was fine and just testing me when I watched him from the side of his bassinet where he couldnt see me one night.....he was in there looking around then randomly a horrible scream would come out followed by a few wimpers then a normal content face again! At that moment I realized Axton knew exactly how to get his way. I said fine we can play this game and a few nights of this happened...that was probably a month or so since we had brought his home from the NICU now Axton sleeps from 11 to 7 or 8 in the morning! We had those random feedings at 4 am and I told his doctor and he told me to "ignore" Axton at these feedings then he would learn at this time he doesnt get to play with mama so its not even worth the ounce of food he is pretending to eat :) so i he got up at 4am, i got him didnt speak to him, feed him on my lap instead of next to me, and then put him directly back to bed whether he wanted to play or not and it worked!!! So in all that i say stay strong and patient! He is fine even though it breaks our hearts to hear those pityful cries....there just playing with us! Love ya bunches and cant wait to see your handsome man :)
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